(See, he naps sometimes...)
When I read it, I vowed to myself that I would not be anything like it, no matter how Elliot turned out to be.
I also vowed I would not be one of those people who complained about every poo or sleepless hour either.
(I was well aware that we were expecting a fairly immature human person who probably would not adhere to what I consider a perfect schedule. At least not until he was a little older and realizes that his father and I hold the keys to treats, communications with Santa and quite possibly his bicycle, so will be advantageous to him to do exactly what we request.)
But as the weeks have gone on,* when people ask me how it's going, I've shrugged and said, "We're fine. It's really not that big a deal. Really it's loads of fun."
And yesterday, I realized how that answer may sound.
So I'd like to amend it by saying that's not what I really mean---or at least not all I mean.
What I really mean is that for months, practically every single person who has ever been a parent has told me at least one worst case scenario.
And as every single day passes and I don't hit that worst case scenario, I count us lucky.
(How we spend some of our time.)
So let's be clear on some things...
Yes, Elliot has projectiled poo'd several times, but only on my hand (and Husband's too). But it wasn't that bad.** Also, the spot on the rug came out.
There have been several times when he wouldn't sleep despite our best efforts, so we walked the halls for a few hours, but then he slept eventually.
When he does sleep, at the very most it's in three hour stretches, but we sort of expected that as well. And it's more than he slept in the beginning and world's better than the stories of babies who never sleep at all.
I have cried several times. For example, once when I was soooooo tired and couldn't figure out what Elliot needed. Another when I wanted BigD to come over immediately and get things in order because clearly things were in complete chaos. Once when Husband was exhausted, but trying to do it all. Another when I realized that we had questions and couldn't find anyone to help in any time zone. But these things usually work themselves out with a wee nap.***
We've sort of gotten the hang of breastfeeding, but he never takes a pacifier. At all. So lots of days, we're all National Geographic, all the time, which is exhausting, especially if you're the sort of person who wants or needs a little teeny, tiny moment of alone time or to leave the house. But he's eating, so that's something.
And there are entire days when I haven't showered or changed out of my pajamas, and neither has Elliot But neither of us are getting particularly sweaty or working construction.
When we do leave the house, which has been a total of three times thus far, it's been a magical feat of timing**** and luck. And once it worked and twice it didn't. The first two times we just went home.
Yesterday was the third time. Our eating schedule was a little off, so Elliot and I went to the parking lot and climbed into the back seat of the car. He had a little snack huddled under a blanket while Husband finished the grocery shopping. Then we all went to Ostehuset for some lunch.
So it's not like it's all smooth sailing in these parts, but it's fine. And the hard moments are just that--- moments ---in the general good of it all.
For the most part, sweet Elliot is cheery or sleepy unless he needs something. But he needs something fairly often and Husband and I haven't quite learned to read his mind or signals yet. And I suspect that these times are harder on us than it is on him..
Overall, it's lovely to watch him change every day. And for him to become slightly more alert and interactive and to see him react to all sorts of things because every single thing is new.
So, it's not easy, but we haven't hit the the worst case in any of it.
Mainly, it's hilarious and great, plus Husband and I have been handling it completely on our own and we're surviving too.***** We even still like each other, which I understand is also a feat.
When I was pregnant, it used to drive me nuts when people would tell me their horror stories of childbirth and new babies.
The unsolicited childbirth ones made me ultra-anxious and annoyed (especially when they came unbidden from people who do not even own vaginas.) And even now, that it's all over, I still think the unsolicited ones are self-serving and un-necessary.
But, I am changing my thoughts on the new baby horror stories.
And, as of tomorrow, Elliot and I will be on our own, at least until BigD gets here on Thursday, so ask me later...I'm sure I'll have some fresh horror stories of my own...
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
*We're in week three right now. Clearly we are pros.
**Think warm caramel sauce. Nope, I'll never eat it again, either.
***By anyone. No kidding.
****When to bathe, when to feed, etc... This goes for all three of us.
*****The BigD is arriving on Thursday and we are ready for reinforcements, for sure. But Husband goes back to work tomorrow and I'll be on my own for a few days until she arrives. We'll see how that goes...
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